The Making of a Coach, Pt. 2: The New Ryan coming out to play

Month eight…good lord almighty, didn’t I just start this program?

Okay, if you don’t know (and why the hell aren’t you intimately familiar by now) I’m about ¾ of the way through a year-long coach training program with Accomplishment Coaching. They bill themselves as the world’s finest coach training program. And I have to say, that’s not just an idle catchphrase. It’s the honest truth.

I just completed weekend eight out of twelve of this program. I’ve spent a good deal of time (and money) to generate a new way of life and a new way of being. And the corner in both of those things has been turned.

I wrote the first one of these after weekend four. I had taken a great deal of ground by that point. But it was child’s play compared with what I have generated by this point.

Let’s backtrack. Most on my team have aspirations of being coaches. I mean, we’re already working as coaches. But I’m just saying.

But when it comes to who we want to be (keyword: be) we’re just now getting access to the fully expressed versions of who we want to be.

For example, I see myself as confident, powerful, and unapologetically Ryan.

What does that mean?

That means that I am who I am. I don’t apologize for who I am or who I was. And that’s pretty awesome to admit.

Y’know, before I even got into coaching I saw a successful coach as usually one particular kind of person. From an outsider’s perspective, this was a pretty narrow box.

I saw successful coaches as attractive, outgoing, life of the party, women. That’s it.

Oh, and Tony Robbins.

Name me four things I’ll never be. And that ain’t no context.

If you include Tony, that’s five things I’ll never be.

But as I sit here, I realize something very cool. I fit the perfect description of what a coach “should” be. And no, I’m not announcing that I’m going to transition and become Rhonda.

Why I say that I am the ideal coach is that I have gone through some stuff. I have gone through some stuff but have come out powerfully on the other side. I have empowered my life into something pretty spectacular.

Look, I am naturally a shy, introverted guy. I much prefer to be by myself with nobody around. But this program is forcing me out of this bubble.

Being that introverted, isolated guy isn’t really serving me anymore. What it served was protecting myself from being picked on and bullied. But was it safety or was it an illusion of safety?

I can’t go into detail about this incident. Let’s just say – what happens at Accomplishment Coaching training weekend stays at AC training weekend.

But this incident brought some grief and pain into my space. It triggered some upset around my family and mourning my mom and dad.

Instead of retreating and hiding and wallowing in my grief (which would’ve been my first pull for like the first 39 years and 7 months of my life) I let my teammates in. I let them in, and they saw me. They saw me as the human being that I am. A human who was scared and upset.

I wasn’t ridiculed and made fun of. I was loved and accepted. And I was able to find my way out of a pretty bad place.

This is because I belong to the most incredible group of people I have ever known in my life. It’s a family, plain and simple. We see each other for how awesome we are. We see each other for our highest and best. We get on each other’s nerves (or maybe it’s just me and just a couple people?) But there’s a base of love that I never never felt in my life. And we’ve known each other for eight months.

This program bills itself as a transformation program that teaches coaching. The transformation is there and it’s started to take hold.

The greatness has always been in me. I just needed a spark to set it ablaze.

And the spark has been found in the basement of a hotel on Wall Street in New York. And I am full of so much gratitude and love that I don’t even know where to put it all.

The old Ryan was amazing and beautiful. The new Ryan is blowing my mind.

Team Ryan: we’re doin’ work, y’all!